Being Civil Doesn't Always Help

Confrontation is basically the worst thing that can happen to me.

Usually I try to be civil. I don't see a need to shout and rant. One party shouts, the other follows and both parties start screaming the heads off and nothing gets resolved.

I believe in being civil. If during a confrontation I get screamed at, I will remain calm and maintain a civil tone of voice. Things always work out if we all just keep calm and think with a clear head.

But plain believing is useless if being civil, in reality, DOESN'T WORK.

Over the course of the last few months, I have had more confrontations than I could have asked for. It's amazing how I can still be well and about.

Anyways, for all these confrontations, I have tried my very best to be civil. It's also amazing how much patience I have. I can proudly say that not once have I lost it in any confrontations. I take much pride that I can keep my cool.

But it's extremely depressing to know that despite raising patience levels and maintaing civil tones, nothing is really achieved at the end.

I REALISED THAT BEING CIVIL HELPS ONLY IF BOTH PARTIES ARE CIVIL.

In a recent major confrontation, I COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY AND THOROUGHLY LOST IT!

Try as I might, it was a futile attempt in making the other party civil. Hence, as they say, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

I was desperate and bewildered. I truly lost my foothold. I think being civil all the time subconsciously snowballed pent-up frustrations. It was like a caged beast set free. I feel so bad just thinking about it. I was screeching my lungs out and bawling my eyes out. Not quite a scene to behold.

In fact, I'm quite ashamed of myself for losing my cool BIG TIME. Recovery was quite fast, though I have to admit that it was very tough!

A couple of days of 'cooling period' after this ugly display of behaviour, the strangest thing happened.

FOR ONCE, A CONSENSUS WAS ACHIEVED! THE UNCOOL CONFRONTATION ACTUALLY CAME TO A RESOLVE!