Recently got Missy Elliot's 'The Cookbook' album.

And once again it's some kick-ass music! Really fantastic! I get so high just listening, cos I'll be grooving to it like mad.

Just to digress a little: PIRACY sucks. Support ORIGINALS.

I usually cannot stand expletives coming out of people mouths. But then when it comes to Missy's music, it's all kinda different already. Somehow, all the F's and B's and S's and N's sound pretty cool.

And do you know what is the coolest thing? I'm blogging from the place closest to heart!

Okay, I've gotta admit it.

I'm really hopelessly in love with the MP3 Player from Oregon Scientific.

I mean, it's gorgeous! I can feel in in my palm and well, ears too. I just get so excited talking about it. If there's a white one, I'mma get it. Cos then, it'll match my specs too!

And yes! Talking about my specs!

So I got the eye exam and chose the frame on Monday night. And the opto person told me that it'll be ready on Thursday. But of course, I was so frickin' excited that I constantly directed myself to the mirror. And I'll just be so happy visualising the new specs on my face. And so I waited for Thursday to come.

Then last night, the opto person called me and told me that my specs were ready. I gasped right into the phone! They took like under 24 hours to get it done! I mean, like WHOA! That's pretty fast eh? So I promptly went down and collected it.

Now I can see clearly. Astig was driving me nuts. And I finally saw what I was missing.

I finally got new glasses. Increased by a hundred degrees. Slap on astigmatism too.

But I'm more excited about the new frame actually.

I saw this MP3 player in Suntec City recently. And I'm hopelessly in love with it. Here it is.

Ultra slim too. Think iPod Nano.

The LCD screen's transparent. TRANSPARENT. Meaning: See through.

And it's going at S$129.00 for 256mb.

Gotta geddit!

There's 2 people. Call them B1 and H2. Not much significance in the pseudos, just for my own pleasure.

Anyways, I was walking along the street buzzing as usual. B1 suddenly popped into my head. I was thinking, it'll be great if I could see B1. Then buzzing along I went. And WHAM! I saw B1. Actually B1 saw me first. Because of my hideous eyesight, it took me some time to figure out that B1 was there.

It was totally awesome! And it was in those unthinkable places. I was like thinking, "Of all places! Awesome! That's cool!".

You get the best you get the worst.

Same case here. Together with B1 was H2. How wonderful. -__-

Just back from Batam recently. Gone there for a Leadership Camp, and had a ball of a time!

The beach resort was fantastic! And for the first time, lodging was devoid of all the cramping into small spaces. I had, we all had, one huge bed to ourselves. It's not those cheap-O single bed with lousy bed frame, but a queen-sized bed with fabulous upholstery!

Before the camp, I went to Penggarang, Malaysia. Went cycling there. And we cycled our way to an ostrich farm! It was kinda shabby, as in the farm, but definitely an eye-opener. And ostriches are pretty gross. That long, bare neck, big bushy and furry body... Okay, maybe not that gross. But still, I don't really like them. Maybe if they present themselves on my dinner platter, then I'd consider loving them. But seriously, the ostrich ba kwa I sampled tasted not bad at all!

And guess what? That frickin' module that I was so confident of failing, I passed! Life is definitely unfair, but it's been really fair to me. 'Cos I've been a deliberate creator. Meaning I've been flowing my positive energy right. And things just fall into place nicely. Believe it, you can mould your life too! Make yourself a Utopia!

Yeah, and my results are fantastic! That is when you consider the amount of effort I put in. Which all adds up to very little, actually. This deliberate creation thing is very effective. 'Cos I've been enjoying myself for the past three weeks!

Looking back on that dark and gloomy period in my life, I can only say, "GOODBYE!!!"

Bidding goodbye never felt so good!

The new school semster's starting in a week. Pretty excited. It's gonna be a brand new start and I've made up my mind to enjoy myself to the fullest. But my timetable's kinda packed, so everyday's gonna be a long day. Think I might just begin taking my multi-vitamins and chicken essence.

This week, I shall stay at home for as long as my schedule permits to inhale as much of that familiar scent as possible, after my many overseas trips. Home is still the place to be.

Once again, IGNORANCE IS BLISS.

Oh yes, I used to diss dumb people. But that didn't make me feel good. So now on, I shall just shut up and smile. However, it does not overwrite the fact that I cannot stand dumbness in poeple.

What the hell am I gonna do with a Diploma in Biotechnology, I used to ask.

But then I realised that's not my concern. It's pretty nice to be able to focus on the goodness of the present moment and not worry about tomorrow. Of course, still set goals and constantly review them. And definitely, FOLLOW YOUR HEART.

See ya!

Yay! I'm back in the Blogosphere!

It's been like ages since the last entry. It feels like I've been deprived of water. But hey, I'm back for now.

Last weekend, I went to KL. But it was really bad. Yeah, like REALLY bad. So, whatever, let it be gone.

Things have been falling into place really nicely for me over the past few days. If I were to die like right now, I would have died without regrets.

Yesterday at work, I was feeling really down. Kinda like mood swings. Now I know how it feels like. But anyways, I was feeling way out of sorts. Even ice-cream tasted bad at that time. But later in the evening, I went to school for training. And it was my first training. Frankly, I was a little worried, but it turned out fun. So I cheered up a little.

This weekend was supposed to be an expedition to Malaysia's Taman Negara Nature Park. But it was cancelled. I was sad at first. Then yesterday in school, they told me that there would be a cycling trip on Saturday. Of course I said I'd go!

Because of the cancelled trip, Friday, meaning today, I would be left free. But I figured if I were to choose to go down for work at the last minute, it would be kinda irritating for the manager. So I scrapped the thought. Then this colleague of mine asked me if I was free today to cover his duties 'cos he's got something on.

So you see, everything's like falling into place nicely.

Even the money's flowing in steadily. I don't know how, but it's definitely a steady cash flow.

I have a list of WANTS, and I was totalling up the estimated worth. Turned out: S$5200.

So I'm in Love

Yeah, with sitcoms, that is. Especially those family-themed. It's just funny. I like how dramatic they are.

I'm not sure whether it was just me or that the TV line-up for weekday mornings used to suck. But now, they have like a whole 2 hours of sitcoms on Channel 5 on weekday mornings. And I just love it!

Bumming

Well, used to. Now it's buzzing. And all the buzzing has definitely paid off. I'm off on a good start. Things have been going well and I'm a happy chap. No worries on how things work out, cos everything just falls into place like magic.

I lost my key to the letterbox some time ago. I was frantically searching for it to no avail. My house is small, but it seemed so big when I wanted to find a key. I was stressing out. Meaning I was flowing negative energy. So the more negative energy flowing out, the more I couldn't find the key.

I was fretting about how the mailbox would be filled with junk mail since my mother would probably not clear it assuming I would do it instead. So I was fretting and worrying and flowing all the wrong stuff.

Then yesterday, I was just thinking how nice it would be to clear the mailbox and have the key slung back together with my bunch of keys. I was just feeling all nice and dandy.

Then I was at the kitchen counter top just leisurely looking around at all the knick knacks and what nots. And very naturally, my focal point flowed to the edge and there it was! The letterbox key! I was plain euphoric!

Like "WHOA!". That energy thing is really powerful. So after that victorious moment, I spent about 3 minutes in front of the mirror basking in my glory and congratulating myself, while expressing incredulous awe.

I feel superb!

Newspaper for Boobs

Last weekend, it was also my first time dressed like a woman. I was in a tube dress with crushed up old newspaper for boobs. And I had mascara on. No other make0up though, cos it was easy to tell that my skin wasn't really conditioned to apply make-up. Anyways, mascara was bad enough cos my lashes were like clumped together and it took a few days for it to come off totally.

"Bapok Nite" they call it. And it was held in a chalet 10 minutes away from Changi Village. How apt to dress up 5 guys as girls.

Like that wasn't embarrassing enough, we had to cat-walk for the people to see. Strut our "stuff". Haha!...

Then, we had to approach male strangers from the neighbouring chalets to come take a pic with us. When the 5 "ladies" went out, people evaded their barbeque pits immediately. I mean, like, Duh! Imagine a hideous freak asking you to take a photo with him/her.

So 3 hideous guys got strangers to take a shot with them. While 2 didn't. That happened to be me and a team-mate. So like every other crazy thing teenagers do, forfeit. Both of us had to dance out in the open. Twisting bodies and gyrating hips. Like really grossed out crap. But it was fun like anything! And I've a picture of me snaking halfway up an imaginary pole. Please be dying to see it, cos I'll be flashing it like NEVER!

But for my closer friends, no harm seeing it. Get a good laugh, be happy, make peace, blah blah blah. Plus it's not like I've never thought of such whacked-out, crazy stunts to pull off. Haha!...

Over the weekend, I had a good share of first-times.

For the first time, I went to Old Changi Hospital, or OCH in short. By far the spookiest and eeriest place to be despite the fact that it was broad daylight when I was there. And I played hide-and-seek there. I was really excited at first, everything was like wow! wow! wow! no matter which room I entered.

But then when we were there for some time, I just felt that I want to get out of the place. It's way too spooky and I just didn't feel like staying any longer. Then the thought of going there again at night turned from "Yeah! Let's do it!" to "Hell no!".

Well, I guess I thought about much better things to do and in the end, I did do much better things and didn't have to face that awful place. So, for the first time, I was at a karaoke session.

It was at Party World KTV at Loyang Point.

I can never, ever, EVER!, make it at singing. It was so embarrassing that I only knew English songs and more embarrassing that people I wasn't really familiar with had to hear my atrocious singing voice. To me, it's like croaking instead. Like a toad with a sore throat croaking away with occasional hiccups and really thick skin to go with.

But hell! We were all there to have fun and I guessed that's all that mattered, even if we were the worst singers. At times, it sorta became like a rock concert, which I really liked. Then 3 hours just flew past and I wished I could've stayed on longer.

I'm like super duper, ultra, ecstatic duringthis weekend. I've never crammed so much fun into any weekend. But it's all kinda exhausting too. I'm way behind in achieving my sleep quota and the healthy diet thing is getting out of hand.

Still, I'm having fun!

The grass is greener on the other side? Well, used to be!

I now find myself standing on the greener pastures. The ground beneath me smells as fresh as bread hot from the oven. And I'm lovin' it!

I don't know why I didn't use to notice the green grass I was treading on. Guess I was really too focused on what I lacked. So now I have started a wonderful journey on flowing positive energy, so me and my Inner Self will finally be able to join as one to create miracles.

I've a long list of Wants and going through that list every day makes me the happiest person alive. I will see myself owning everything on the list and gollly, that's like the most wonderous feeling. Sometimes,there's this churning sensation in the tummy, kinda like going down a steep track on a rollercoaster.

And I've been smiling much much more. Smiles that generate from genuine happy thoughts. I'm just so happy that nothing else matters.

Excuse me, your LIFE is waiting by Lynn Grabhorn

That's the title of my new read. Talks all about the flow of positive energy, which in other words, means making your feelings work for you. And it's not the usual preaching on optimism. In fact, it's much more than optimism. It focuses a lot on positivity. And that gave me a whole new perspective on optimism itself.

And the great thing about self-help books is that they talk to you, and sometimes you wanna talk to them too. You laugh with (sometimes at) them. It's all about you, you and you, instead of some Nora, Ricky or Lenny that you don't even know.

So you think you see what you see when you look up into the sky. Well, at first, you just see blue, you see clouds, blah blah blah, the usual stuff. That's why I say this book is great. After reading it, the sky appears different. Not weird different, but pleasant different. It's all kinda subtle, but you can definitely feel the change in things.

Just like a few days back when I was having yet another exam paper. For the last 20 minutes or so, I felt I had enough work for the day, so I just stopped. And I'm really glad I got a window seat in the classroom. So for that 20 minutes or so, I was looking at clouds, and I felt so happy. It's a kind of buzzing that's really positive, the kind of fuzzy and warm sensation that you feel coming, strongly or subtly, from within, then spreads all over and you just feel that life is worth so much more.

Indeed, it is. Life is worth aplenty. I've learnt that there is no use fretting and worrying and trying to make things work out. Cos you're all tensed up and flowing all the negative energies. And according to Lynn Grabhorn, flowing negative energies attracts any other thing that's on the same frequency, meaning, more unfortunate events. So now, I feel like I should take a back seat, enjoy and appreciate every thing, big or little, and maintain that buzz within me.

Pull On the Reins!

I figured it's time to pull on the reins. Pull real hard, that is.

I realised that I haven't been steering the navigation. Now it's like everything's spiralling out of control. I intend to gain that control back. I'm gonna fight for it till the end. But that'll take a lot, because the biggest obstacle lies ahead. Yes, the "P" word.

It's a habit, and you know how difficult it is to kick bad habits. But calling for an attitude overhaul is definitely crazy. So it's best to gnaw away at things bit by bit.

I've made up my mind to work harder next semester. Meaning I'm staying put in Biotech. Pretty sad, but if I can channel all that frustration into positive energy that'll benefit my projects and report, why not?

I need to become more organised and manage my time better. I've set some goals already, and I shall re-evaluate them regularly, making sure that my life is on the right track. It's a must that I become goal-oriented.

And today, first on my agenda was: "Fail exam."

It gives me great joy to cancel it out on my agenda. I have done well in not doing well.

Riiiight, whatever.

Yesterday, while I flipped open the notes to attempt studying, I sorta hit my head hard on the ground, metaphorically speaking. I dawned on the fact that I was as trashy as the contents in my notes. I asked myself, "What the hell have I been doing?!"

So I made up my mind that I shall re-take that module next semester. It's the same exam module that I failed today. Because I could only leave 40 minutes after commencement, I decided to attempt some questions. And because I didn't wanna appear apathetic, I stayed on for one full hour before I left the examination hall, erm, room actually.

So next semester is gonna be a brand new beginning that I'lllook forward to eagerly.

And there's plenty of planning and goals to achieve for the time to come.

And so my first exam paper is over! My first exam experience in Singapore Polytechnic.

The coolest thing about it was probably because the paper was in the evening. Like 6 to 8.10 pm.

So you can leave if you have finished the paper, provided it's at least 40 minutes into the duration. Some people left early, but my class stayed on till the 2 hours was up. After the invigilator said "Time's up, pens down," he went around to collect the scripts.

I was thinking, "Did he have to? Can't we all just hand in the scripts ourselves and get the hell outta there?"

After he finished collecting, we were just waiting for something to happen. Then I thought, "Hey, we can go,"

So I stood up. Then the invigilator said, "Please remain seated."

"What the hell?" But I just laughed it off anyway, cos I was the only one who stood up.

So 20 to 30 seconds after I sat down, "All right, you may leave,"

What's all these crap about?

----------------------

Surprising but true, I have taken up reading. But I'm reading books on self-help and self-improvement. It's fantastic. My first read is "The Only Clutter Control Book You'll Ever Need: Fast, Easy Ways to Clean Up the Mess and Conquer the Chaos" by Andrea Mattei.

Cos my house is a dump!

And the strangest thing about the book is that it touches on mental clutter too. It says that to clear clutter, you first have to clear your mind and that organisation and planning is very important. It even talks about proper attitudes to adopt. Then I came across a section that was real, real, cool.

Says,

"Psychologists determine whether people have optimistic or pessimistic characters based on their explanatory style when describing an unfortunate event. The explanatory style has three parts:

1. The internal/external explanation: Optimists tend to believe that external factors causes misfortune; pessimists tend to blame themselves (the internal factor).
2. The stable/unstable explanation: Optimists tend to see misfortune as unstable or temporary; pessimists tend to see misfortunes as stable or permanent.
3. The global/specific explanation: Optimists tend to see problems as specific to a situation; pessimists tend to see problems as global---that is, unavoidable and pervasive."

Hmm, pretty interesting eh? And the best part is the part on the "P" word. What "P" word? That "P" word.

Says,
"Procrastinators are highly-skilled individuals, and most clutter bugs are no exception. ... Procrastination requires the ability to create convincing excuses---convincing enough to persuade not only others but yourself as well. A procrastinating pack rat concosts all sorts of creative reasons... If this sounds like you, give yourself a pat on the back for being so creative, then pour all that creativity into actually accomplishing something."

My gosh! When I read that, I was like, "Spot on, man! What the hell?! It's frickin' true!"

Depression and Other Problems

Studying makes me depressed. That's why I always change my venue of study, which usually leads to no where. In fact, my destination has always been a mystery. Well, the beach is a really good place to end up in.

Speech Problem

Few months back, someone actually pointed out a speech problem that I actually have. It's actually not a big problem, but it's still one nonetheless.

Actually, I don't actually see what is wrong with my speech. I actually find it perfectly all right. It was actually to appease the person's big mouth that I actually admitted it.

I think we actually have many subtle habits that people actually observe. The worse thing is, you don't actually realise it until someone actually comes up to you and tell it to your face.

I hope I can actually pin-point my actual speech problem. When I actually do, I'll to try my best to get rid of it, actually. But if it actually turns out to be a habit, then I'm afraid that I have to actually give it my all. And actually, that may not necessarily curb my speech deficiency.

We actually do things unconsciously and observers actually find some of these things getting on their nerves. I'm actually still pretty confused over what exactly my problem actually is. I really hope that some kind soul will actually enlighten me on the problem.

ACTUALLY.

Editor's note: I was hysterical after posting this. (Hysterical laughter)

Time to Spare

On Saturday, I was studying. Yes, for once, I was actually studying.

I was at Starbucks in Simei Eastpoint Mall. I barely made it through one chapter on the human respiratory system. After that, I was more into staring into space and slacking.

So I'd decided to wander the streets. From Simei, I took a train ride to Bedok. From Bedok, I took a Bus ride to Pasir Ris. Then I walked to Pasir Ris Park and strolled by the beach. Relaxed on one of the benches while I looked on out at the sea. Can you hear the sea breeze? Can you hear the waves crash?

I've got time, lots and lots of time.

My Outrageous Wish List 2

1. Spray someone with a fire extinguisher.
2. Become a lawyer.
3. Shop at Tangs and Paragon.
4. Turn bald.
5. Run my own shop selling clothes AND gelato ice-cream.
6. Experience natural disasters, preferably earthquakes and tornadoes.
7. Pole-dance in MRT.
8. Enter showbiz OR Become a superhero.
9. Pick up Spanish, Latin and French.
10. Complete 72 hours movie marathon OR Sit alone in a cafe and talk to imaginary friend.

My Outrageous Wish List

1. Hot pink hair with black highlights.
2. Curse and swear and lecturers.
3. Flung all my examination papers.
4. Ride on world's highest rollercoaster.
5. 100 pairs of shoes.
6. 50 caps.
7. Bum around and score straight A's for examination papers.
8. Sit with only person at far back of a bus and smile suggestively at him/her.
9. Get my own penthouse just the way I like it.
10. Die peacefully in sleep.

BLEAHHHhhh...

The Nerd Evolution mechanism is faulty. In fact, I think it never existed.

So try as I might yesterday, I still couldn't get myself to study faithfully. I only managed to cover like under 1% of all that had to be covered. It's pathetic.

And later, I've a remedial class to attend, blah, blah, blah...

All these shit is making me sick. I'd love for some ice-cream now.

The more I listen to Frankie J, the more I like his voice. Plus the songs from his 'The One' album are so nice!

So I had his CD playing while I struggled to studied. And I ended up focussing more on his songs than A&P. Revision sucks! And it don't just suck, it sucks big time! It's infuriating!

Man, I'm ill-disciplined. That's why I think I'm the perfect applicant for the 'Bummer' position available. I mean, I have all that it takes to face the challenges ahead. I'm a bummer, bummer, bummer, and I love it!

Damn, I hope I can bring my ass down to mug as hard as I can. Guess I'll just take it that I'm taking a break from being a bummer. Hopefully it works.

Bum around, bum around, bum, bum, bumming around...

"Please revise chapters 3, 4, 7, ... before you come for the lesson"

So says my Anatomy & Physiology (A&P) Lecturer. So the thing is, I got chosen for a special class that she'll be holding. And it's call a remedial class.

How great and exciting. So I haven't been slogging my guts out for her module, and seems like it's time I did. Cos the exam is in a week's time. And the frickin' exam schedule chose to have this paper as the first one. DUMB...

I think I have to begin studying like a nerd, be some hardworking, studious student. Oh wells, oh well, oh well...
This whole exam thing is frickingly lame. I hate like crazy. Wish I could bash its ugly face up. Like relly bash it up real good, get everything all mashed up and stuff.

Okay, so some say it's not all bad. And the good news is, it's really not all bad! Look, I get special attention when others don't. So beat that. After this entry, I'll be heading home to study A&P. Maybe I'll decide to prove to myself that I can score real good for the module. And it's all about proving to myself and not others.

Guess I indeed slacked too much. Now I'm guilty. I should've slacked more few weeks back. Cos all the midnight oil oughta be burnt only in the week that's to come. I so regret it. (Sobs)

Yeah, whatever.

Nerd Evolution, Go!